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reductionismandthebeast:

So apprently I’m using this thing for blogging now, which feels strange and wrong and won’t last.

I want to write just a tiny little bit about Cato priest, you see.

So Anders Behring Breivik/ABB/He Who Cannot Be Named/Archimedes Balfour Birkenstock/whatever you choose to call him, is currently in solitary confinement in Ila prison. He’s only allowed contact with the police, his attorney, prison staff, and the prison priest. Turns out this priest is Odd-Cato Kristiansen, affectionately known as “Cato prest” (Cato priest). And look, I’m not big on the clergy, but this guy is amazing.

He started out in the same small town my father’s side of the family is from. He then moved on to Oslo for, you know, priest-y stuff and generally being a BAMF. If you wanted to speak with Cato priest you might have had better luck ditching the church-going and going for a seedy bar in a bad part of town instead. He’d be there, chainsmoking and chugging beers, talking to the most hardened criminals and the most worn down drug addicts. Talking, not preaching, or lecturing. When author Jo Nesbø gave him half a million NOK on account of being a Generally Good Dude, Cato handed it straight over to Naandi Norway, a branch of the Naandi Foundation, an Indian social sector organization focusing on child rights, water and sanitation and sustainable livelihoods. He’s cool, is what I’m saying.

I haven’t seen him in ten years, after he led my grandmother’s funeral service. He attended the post-funeral repast as well, because he’s cool, and I remember hanging out outside with him, puffing away on our cancer sticks. I just remember thinking, “BAMFBAMFBAMFBAMFBAMF CAN WE BE FRANS PLS”.

Cato sees the good in everyone. so it makes sense he decided to become a prison priest. Ila tends to hold the worst criminals our fair motherland has to offer, but Cato wants them to have comfort, hope and respite all the same. They probably need it more than anyone.

And now he’s facing ABB, the narcissistic right-wing extremist sociopath responsible for the Oslo city bombing and the Utøya massacre, events that claimed the lives of 77 people. Cato says he’s hoping to eventually, somehow, find a smidgeon of humanity somewhere in there, behind everything, in this person even he is willing to refer to as “almost evil incarnate”.

And if Cato priest can’t find it, it’s not there. No one can convince me otherwise. And I am going to allow myself to be sentimental in the most basic sense and light a damn candle for this homie.

mizabitha:

all of my friends love playing boys and girls!  it’s the new craze that’s swept the nation since i sarcastically invented it just now in an effort to look hip.  you can play with any number of people, but the more the better!  the rules are simple:

• Split into two teams.  They don’t have to be equal, I don’t give a shit.
• Flip a coin.  Teams convene to call it.  Winners of the toss are boys.  Girls are losers.
• One member of the boys’ team says a thing that is true of all of their team, without the chance to confer with the team over if it is actually true.  These can be physical traits, mannerisms, hobbies, anything.  This rule remains for the rest of the game, so write it down or some shit.
• A girl says a thing that is true of all their team!  These, again, become rules.
• Go around again, this time with the next person in the team giving a rule.  Again, no chance to confer.  You may look at team members and think for as long as you like.
• Every three rounds the boys get to take their turn and ALSO make a rule about all the girls, but this one cannot be true about any of the boys.  This is a special boys-only privilege.
• If anyone breaks a rule they are required to stand up and admit it when the rule is laid down.  They are kicked off of their team onto the opposing team.  If they break a pre-existing rule of their new team, They are out of the game.
• Alternately, if a player knows or realizes someone else breaks a rule they are allowed to accuse them.  In this case, the deceitful player is out of the game immediately, whether or not they already switched teams.
• The winner is the team which more vehemently defended the sanctity of their rules - that is to say, the loser is the team that still has players in it when their opponent loses their last member.

i think that’s about it…

• Oh, also, when a player is out of the game, both teams have to beat the shit out of them until they start seizing.  I hope you didn’t call no medical attentionsies!

• Split into two teams. They don’t have to be equal,…